My two-day getaway trip just ended, and here I am, all by myself, doing the things I love. I love the fact that Phnom Penh has that laid-back, lazy, holiday-ish mood to it now that people have not returned from their respective destinations. Anyway, I just took great pleasure in reading PM's second post on her private blog, and I was sincerely happy seeing that she made the effort to be active on her second blog (3rd? 4th?). She wrote about friends not having the traits she desired.
I got over that for quite some time now! And I have come to the realisation that these friends are like missing pieces of the jigsaw. You take one piece from this friend and another from that friend to fit everything together to form a complete jigsaw. The important thing is the knowledge of which friend plays his part best in which scenario. There is a saying that goes, "You can't expect a bird to hold and a hand to fly". It is true in every way! A bird can fly, and a hand can hold. But the roles cannot be swapped. I have learnt I cannot expect a quiet friend who enjoys having deep conversations with me to have as much fun drinking and clubbing the nights away. Neither can I vent out my deep dark secrets on someone who has the attention span of a 5-years-old. We all at one point wish that one friend could do both or more, but friendship-wise, there is no crime more barbaric than trying to change a friend, for your very own sake. However, things have been so much better for me when I have finally figured this out, but now that I start thinking about it, my mind is on something else. A relationship.
Knowing which friend fits in well with which context and therefore taking actions accordingly is healthy for all parties involved since you know where that line is drawn. But then when it comes down to a relationship, it is probably ten times harder. We are talking about finding that needle in the haystack! How could you possibly find someone who could enjoy clubbing as much as sitting down in a quiet coffee shop on a Saturday afternoon, sipping coffee and just thinking about life? Someone who loves the wet, wild crowd on a New Year's Eve as much as the peace and quiet of the countryside? Someone who loves talking as much as staying silent? How could possibly find that someone?
They tell us to love an imperfect person perfectly! That rhymes and it sounds beautiful and everything. But then doesn't it come across as something forced and not natural? We do not set out to find that perfect person, but we do hope to find someone who could connect with us on many different levels. We set out, not to find the pieces, but to find the jigsaw! Don't get wrong! I do not spend all this time alone being bitter and thinking about this and everything. But it's just that it amazes me how someone could bump into his "soulmate" despite the billions of people out there. At other times, I have seen people who are the exact opposites fall in love, and it gets me thinking how that is even possible noting that they can barely connect on anything. Is it as if they had to build everything, including their very own traits, from scratch? Or, is it simply because they are just trying too hard to make it work? Or are they simply oblivious to everything I have just mentioned here and just … live?
Jigsaw, where are you?
P. S: I am not even trying now. Or possibly EVER.