You know what sucks? Sitting next to the person you really really like, knowing you cannot have him/her--that sucks big time! For those who take things the easy way, even if they find themselves tangled up in all this, they have an ingenious way of manipulating their feelings, and manage to get by just fine. Too bad that this is not always the case for the sensitive people! Usually, in the face of such odds, they somehow turn from caterpillars--figuratively, of course--to, not beautiful, dearly-loved butterflies, but drama queens! They choose to strip off anything that lights them up and makes them happy, push happy-go-lucky friends away, and start digging themselves a hole, where sorrow and gloom and hopelessness live. Well, in other words, they start to develop what I call "self-pity", which is not in any ways attractive at all, at least to me.
For all the right reasons in the world, yes, it is sad! Such an experience hurts to the core when you seriously sit down and are really rapt in thoughts about it! If anybody knows it well, I must be one of those, and it still tastes bitter on the tip of my tongue! But gone are the days when I locked myself up in the room, and tortured myself with all those rejection lines! While forgetting the experience is probably like getting rid of a deeply-wounded scar, which takes much longer time than we hope it does, reliving the heart-wrenching experience is not at all healthy. The thing about the negative feelings is they always always find a way to squeeze their way through with the tiniest opening that you allow, and before you know it, you are already too wrapped to resist the the rising and falling ride of the emotions.
My point is pain hurts, and there is no doubt. But what probably hurts more is the possibility that one morning when you wake up, you realize you have wasted two years of your life on haunting images of the past, two years that could be very fruitful for something more meaningful and blissful. I was once in those shoes, and I have to admit I regret not having put up a tougher fight with those negativities. I now know even in the darkest hours of my life, I still could have tried a little harder and reached for the light button--the button of choices!