My ears ...

Suddenly, friends and acquaintances find themselves being swallowed up by problems, most of which are love-related. If I were the Vendy from 3 years ago, I would not be at ease perching on top of my chair, simply observing them from the distance. I would be too caught up in dashing about from one to another, asking them with probing questions, trying to fill myself in those shoes, and stressing my brain out to think of ways to best help them out of the misery. If there is anything that hinders me from engaging in the routine again, it must be the lessons I have learnt from such acts. First of all, I have finally come to the realization that there is so much I can do yet so little I should do. Probably it is true that I am gifted with a "good" pair of ears, and over the course of time and experiences, sitting down with and genuinely listening to them pouring their hearts out for just 3 hours helps them feel more relieved than trying to run around to get their things fixed on their behalf. In fact, while listening, I know how to inject some pieces of advice into the flow of the conversation even though deep down I have come to understand that they might not be very useful. In addition, sometimes too much care might only hurt you in the end. When you care for them too much, you feel their pain and anxieties, and therefore, you just want to offer a hand all the time to the point where you put them in an uncomfortable situation. Once you keep pushing too hard, you might just end up being sliced by some words you wish you would never want to hear. Furthermore, chances are when I am in deep emotional turmoil, I am not confident about the fact that they can do the same to me the way I do to them. Even with sheer listening, it is not easy to find friends or acquaintances who want to hear your stories. As a result, my ears are all I should have for them. And though their issues seem to escalate in size, I find myself being able to detached myself from their problems and not treating theirs as my own because by doing so I will not get stressed and will not get hurt once they cannot live up to my expectations. But of course, I always want the best for them!