Dilemma

Been away for a while, no thanks to the long tedious Khmer New Year break. Classes are resumed once again, and I am dragged back into the life of slavery at IFL once again also. Well, perhaps a little too exaggerated, yeah. But it is true that I am being a little overstretched.

Anyway been preoccupied by my cousin's dilemma. I am sure if I were in her shoes I would be feeling as if I were in the tug of war. She has to choose between her boyfriend who is loathed by almost every relative, including me, and a guy she barely knows. I address the "new" guy by Bong since he is as old as my brother, and despite the fact that I have met him in person just once, I could tell that he is way more mature and responsible and polite and...You name it. There is no denying that my cousin's current boyfriend is no match for him. Maybe except for the painful truth that she is too heads over heel in love with that ruthless jerk. And I guess this matters a lot. But what from I perceive, I doubt his love for my cousin. He always seems very full of himself, and every time I see my cousin with him, I feel that she deserves more than just mere shorthands and the cold shoulder he has been giving her. She deserves to feel more cared for. And it pains me even more when it is apparent that she does NOT mind being maltreated that way!

Everyone, her parents, my parents, and other relatives, obviously are showing green light to her marrying the "new" guy. He has almost everything that an ideal husband can ever possibly offer. He is a son of a high-ranking official. He owns two 4-star hotels in Siem Reap. He is having a decent job at the Microsoft in the States. Needless to say, he is more than just friendly and polite to everyone. But my cousin claims that there are so many differences that come in between them. I am just being afraid that by the time she learns more things it will be no turning back.

Comments

Sopheary said…
This is a real big dilemma. In my point of view, just because the 'new' guy is a son of a high-ranking official and has a lot of riches, doesn't mean that he can be a good husband. There's every possibility that someone is a good man in the society yet a bad husband in the family. I've witnessed this in a lot of successful men. She should spend more time to learn about the 'new' guy first before making the decision. After all, life is not all about riches and reputation.
Rithy said…
Totally agree with pm. Its a little too early to say if your cousin's potential husband is a good man. Her current boyfriend who is believed to be a ruthless jerk at the moment may have even better behaved than him the very first time they met. I believe all she needs is time. you never know what she feels as for her own happiness coz you were not in her shoes. What appears to be happiness for you may not be the happiness she wishes for. Do you trust her??? if you do, just give her time. And m sure she will choose the best one for herself.
Unknown said…
Anything doesn't matter the matter is she LOVE the guy and the GUY loves her or not. Be it richer, poorer, they'll love each other! This is hard!
I get your point, guys. And i am not holding a negative view point towards her bf just cos he is not as rich. But I am talking about his attitude and behaviour towards her and towards the rest of us. Anyway i trust her, yeah, but trusting her is not enough. We are afraid she will make a mistake. But of course I agree that she needs time to learn about him first. And you guys were talking about love? Well considering examples in real life, marrying the one you love might not be enough.
Unknown said…
Well, I guess when someone's so deep in love with one person, it's hard to say anything. Sometimes interfering too much might be bad. So just make sure she's ready to accept this relationship. As for me, I would marry those who love me :P lolz.. not exactly those I love. cuz those who love me will love me forever but those I love, well, don't know if they really love me too? complicated...
To hour: interesting!! I think if i remember correctly, Mi Oun always puts it that way: Marrying the one who loves her rather than marrying the one she loves.

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